at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
Sorry. I was preoccupied thinking about penises
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