Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I don't know if I'm more excited about getting chipotle or about getting laid
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize
