So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
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