wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
It's like shitshowville, population: those girls.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
Randomize
