Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
I woke up and he was starring at me and then said "do you believe in miracles"?
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
Randomize
