Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
Stalkers don't have time for showers...it's a full time job
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Randomize
