Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
pretty sure i remember announcing that i lost my virginity to that brad paisley song when it came on during power hour?
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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