if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
he's dressed up as pikachu 3 fucking years in a row and gotten laid each time. i don't understand
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
