I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I can't stream porn because Xbox live is taking all the Internet. I thought having a male roommate would make life easier.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
Randomize
