Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize