The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
genius alert. I just invented a contraption made of toilet paper and rubber bands that makes it so your balls don't stick to your leg when you wake up from sleeping. I call it, The Balldozer
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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