Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
throwing up in the shower isnt as glamorous as i expected
since when the fuck is that glamorous?
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
I'm perplexed as to why anyone on this planet is straight
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
Randomize
