During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
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