I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I was expecting a blowjob when she shoved me in the bathroom but instead she shaved my pubes into a mustache for my penis. I am still satisfied.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
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