This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Funniest shit happened at the grocery store. This kid kept asking his mom for candy over and over and she told him 'daddy said no' and he screamed 'he isn't my dad' so loud everyone in the store was silent it was awesome.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Randomize
