PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
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