guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Beer vodka and pink lemonade powder mixed together. So. Many. Penises. My vagina will be calling out to them tonight. Coooooooooooooome.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
They tried to dine n dash at dennys and the waiter jumped on their car and broke their windshield
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
He convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. He slurred every word. I think I found my prince charming.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
Randomize
