Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
She told me she brought a guy home but that he looked pickled. And no, that's not an autocorrect.
Hahahah pickled
I asked her what she meant and she said that he looked like he had soaked in water.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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