i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
