If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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