I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
Ate lunch. Still drunk. Keep forgetting I'm in Texas but then I look around at the people and remember.
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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