i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
It's blow job season.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize