Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
