I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Randomize