I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Did I show you my penis last night?
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
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