Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I quit life. I got pulled over on my way to work and they towed my car and dropped me off at work in a cop car
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
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