This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize