Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Every time I type "should" my phone autocorrects to "shouldn't". even my phone knows my ideas are terrible.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
Apparently while fucking a girl in the ass last night I cracked a molar, trying to find a dentist now.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
