You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
