you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
