It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
It's like God tapped him on the shoulder and said "You are now capable of giving world shattering, tear jerking head."
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
