addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Listen, you eat the donut. I eat you out. Everybody wins.
Randomize
