i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
Randomize
