I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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