I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
Randomize
