it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Randomize