Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
I have demons in me.
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
