saw you had $9 in your checking acct, left $20 on your dresser so you won't be a whore this weekend
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
Randomize
