Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
So you really have to stop introducing me to girls and afterwards saying "he has his dick pierced" let them find out for themselves
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
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