so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
I want her autograph on my taint
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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