just come out here and I will go home with you...
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
The plane down was full of newly weds and I counted 5 pairs of mile high club members. Actually, one might have been a group membership discount.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
