Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
And then he peed in my hair
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