Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
