you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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