I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
there was a trapeze. enough said
There's a girl sitting in front of me making a PowerPoint on Jack Bauer.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
