Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
