somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I just found out that there's a bar that has happy hour at 12 pm. It's like the universe doesn't want me to be sober
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