It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
