another moral hangover. fuck.
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
