My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
wouldnt it be awesome if walks of shame were like charity walks...you could get sponsors and shit and donate money to curing STDs or cancer
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Remember the Giant sandworm from the movie Dune? Well that's about how big his dick is. No bulshit.
Randomize
